There’s a solution that could help you escape your marriage’s chaos only to fall back to the pile of unorganized clothing and takeaway food in your life.
Being a 24-year-old self-sustaining Indian man, I was the only issue of time until my mother approached me and said, ” Beta shaadi ka kya soche ho?” In its literal sense, it’s a superficial inquiry that reads, ” Son, have you given marriage a thought?” It is advisable, however, not to fall to believe that. If your Indian parent asks this question, what you hear within your brain is the sound that signals the start of a boxing round. Round One, Ladies and Gentlemen, is just beginning.
Since the period of Lal Krishna Advani (or the dinosaurs), Arranged marriages have been a fundamental component of what we call “Bharatiya Sanskriti.” The parents of our grandparents went through it, as did our grandparents. It and their grandparents also had to go through it. So, chuckling on your mom’s face may be adequate once, twice, or thrice (if you’re fortunate); however, you’ll eventually gain a piece of her thoughts. Being aware of Indian mothers will be one heck of a party pooper to your peace. You’re a cornered piece of meat, and you’re aware of that.
Be assured that you’re not the only one to be the only one who has to speak there to get from this. We have a solution that could get you out of this mess and back to the pile of clothing and food items that your life has become.
Understanding the Enemy
The battles that were won came with a thorough comprehension of the enemy’s movement in their location, training, and, most important thing, their mental state. The earlier you acknowledge that this is a fight you cannot escape, the more effective it will be. Consider your high school years, your college days, and your work. Every single one of these has been awaited for the moment when your parents will turn their backs and place advertisements on a page for marriage in a major newspaper. (Special note for the doctor couple who will not accept anything less than an obstetrician bahu.)
It has been planning for this moment since the day you were born. They know your thoughts and will employ this against you. Fortunately, you’re not alone. Your parents know you in the same way as you know them. Do your homework, and you’ll be able to anticipate their next move far ahead of time. Learn about the people they are with, what they’ve been reading lately, and who they’re looking to connect you with, and you’re covered in this department.
Weapons Training
Stones and sticks can damage your bones. However, this fight is won with neither. It is imperative to prepare for one of the following weapons: Rant-47 (fired in brief, angry blasts) as well as or the Dismiszer Cannon(shoots every reasoning out of the closest window) as well as The Emo Grenade (all your thoughts are mine). The most deadly is The Big Daddy (“Dad is eager to speak about the you”). My dear friend, I do not have any weapons in these categories. Most of what you own to hand (when not adequately prepared) can be tracked and destroyed through your MoM Radar. What are you supposed to do? Duh! Find your weapons!
If you’ve completed Step One correctly, you likely have an indifference Shield that neutralizes the Rant-47 and allows the user to remain at peace and continue. A Logic Retriever dog is your ideal companion when facing a Dismiszer firing. It will chase the logic that was thrown away, returns it to you, and permits you to continue pursuing the adversaries with the same until you’ve made headway. It also will lick your face each time it locates logic, ensuring that you have your Emo Guard is always on!
Tiptoeing around Big Daddy
The weapon is massive, can fire a single shot, and seldom misses. Imagine dreams; imagine mushrooms for those lucky that the Big Daddy CAN be tackled. All you have to do is ensure that you’ve captured the rest of your adversaries. Suppose you’d like them to serve as prisoners of war or as allies is your choice. While fighting with others in battle, make sure not to disturb the sleeping giant. After that, and you’ve got all their weapons off or seized, shoot at your will. You will win.
Declaring War
Although it’s as easy as it might appear, this is difficult to master. It is essential to be punctual. You can ask Mother India for advice. In the past, this country has never actually declared war. Be ready for an opportunity to provoke. When you are prompted, give an alert and start your preparations. Twice initiated, communicate your war cry. Thrice provoked, attack!
